Wednesday, March 28, 2012

What’s the Fantasy?

With all the excitement over the $500 million Mega Millions lottery drawing, I've started thinking about how I'm going to spend my winnings (since, I think it's obvious that I will win it), and reviewing how my life will change. A girl has got to be ready for this sort of thing.

You know that the changes will not just be limited to changing my phone number and moving to a remote island (though those are clearly the first ones). For instance, perhaps Colin Firth has always had a movie script in the back of his closet that he has wanted to get made, but has never found the financing. If I call him as a pauper and offer to try to help him, I'm betting that I would not receive a return call from his agent. With $500 million sitting in the bank, someone might return my phone call. The point is, a middle-aged woman with a dream and no cash is a woman with very little power. A middle-aged woman with $500 million is a woman with a dream and the means to force other people to listen to it ad nauseam.

Money would certainly help my life right now. It would mean no need to go back to employment when my year is up. It would mean the ability to focus attention on projects (commercial and non-profit) that I think are interesting or important. My travels would become more exotic (and consistent). Also, I'd go back to Macy's and buy some of the stuff I liked, but couldn't really afford because it was not on sale, and I'd reacquaint myself with Jimmy Choo after an enforced, way-too-long absence.

There's only one tiny problem: the thing I really want, I can't buy. I can't even rent it. My biggest fantasy is to have the people I admire, admire my work. I want the people who interest me to be interested in me. You could argue that the money could buy someone's notice, but that isn't the same as respect. You could also argue that the money would mean getting my work to a wider audience, and it would increase my chances of the fantasy coming true. But higher visibility is no guarantee.

Let's be clear: I will take the money when they call my numbers. It will make my life better. It could potentially make the lives of the people around me better (the line starts behind Pen). But I have a feeling that the odds of me getting what I really want are the same whether the jackpot is mine or not (it is).

So, if you were to win the lottery (not this one, as it is mine), would it buy you what you really want?


Helen said...

Yes! Yes, it would definitely buy me everything I want! Except love, but I have heard you can rent that by the hour, so I'm good! I kid (mostly), but I do think money can buy most of the things I want. First of all my freedom to only do things I really care about (paycheck be damned!) Secondly, to do more of the things I enjoy, but cannot currently afford. I also suspect being a happier, more fulfilled person may actually open me up to romantic possibilities. I have heard bitter is unattractive (to which I say "fuck the hell off!"--a phrase I'm sure I learned in a Dale Carnegie seminar.) If bitter is unattractive and winning the lotto makes me happy, I may actually become more attractive and find love. Which means it is entirely possible that money can actually buy me love! I am willing to test this theory.

Kate, Dating in LA said...

LOL!! I'm willing to help with that experiment. Also, I do believe that is a direct Dale Carnegie quote.

danielletbd said...

YES. And then some. All I really want is a house on the beach and unrestricted time to read and tan and hang out with my puppy and write only the things I want to write. Half a billion dollars can buy me my own island. It's more than I need.

Kate, Dating in LA said...

I can relate to that--though technically, I currently have unrestricted time to read and tan. It would be nice to know that those things would be more permanent additions.

Carey Hagan said...

I'd like Italian clothes and Italian shoes. Also, I'd like to be able to give to the nature/animal conservation groups that constantly send me those little address labels even though I only gave them a few bucks several years ago. I feel really guilty about that. Oh wait: I'm worried about the polar bears, too. Gotta give to those groups: shore up the damn arctic ice or something. But definitely Italian shoes.

Kate, Dating in LA said...

Those things are all strong. I'm now hoping you and I wear the same shoe size. :)