Anybody miss me? I’ve actually aged a year since I’ve written for this blog. No, seriously, I’m an entire year older even though I’ve only been gone for about 2 weeks. I’m not sure how that happened. My friend Pen posited that it had something to do with me going to a karaoke bar with a group of people on a Saturday night. She personally lost time (an entire hour from what I understand). I tried to point out that it had more to do with that DST thing, but she stands firm. We tested the theory out again the following Saturday when I attended a charity event—also at night. No lost time reported, but there was some earth shifting, so that fit.
Regardless of the whole “lost time” issue, this aging thing is confusing me. I don’t feel like an adult. I still feel about 24 only with substantially less stamina and no love life to speak of. Also, I do have somewhat less grasp on the socially acceptable uses for avocadoes, but I think that’s a California thing.
Because I feel 24, I kept hoping that my parents would call and that the conversation would go something like this.
Parents: “We lied about your age to get you into school earlier”.
Me: “So, I’m really a year younger?”
Parents: “A tiny bit more, actually.”
Me: “I see. How much younger?”
Parents: “Ten years.”
Me: “Sweet.”
It isn’t important that 10 years is awfully hard to fake. I felt that this scenario was a strong possibility. Still waiting for that call.
Because I’ve been gone so long, I’m sending you a treat. Also, I think we can all agree that I should work for “The Onion”.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jd4tugPM83c
And as a teaser, my next blog is definitely (probably) going to be about this guy:
http://news.aol.com/article/man-has-two-wives/391268?icid=mainmaindl1link4http%3A%2F%2Fnews.aol.com%2Farticle%2Fman-has-two-wives%2F391268
Kate, still waiting for that call, in Los Angeles
Los Angeles-- Where Dating comes to Die. No one dates in Los Angeles. Ok, no one that isn't a supermodel or actress or 21 or blonde. But I haven't given up entirely-- at least not this week.
9 comments:
I have hoped my parents would call and say the same thing-- only that I was actually born ten years BEFORE I actually was. Wanna trade?
LOL!! Yes!
Want to know something depressing? Two things actually. My friend went to our sorority house to visit last week...apparently they no longer have our pictures up because we graduated too long ago. The other thing...my health insurance is going up $100 in August just because I am turning old.
OMG, LMAO, seriously, I am afraid I might need 'Despondex', even if in small doses hahahaha Loves it, but please don't give it to me unless I absolutely need it in a sea of unperkiness peeps.
BTW, I can attest to the karaoke bar, true story, lol.
@Lauren-- Ok, both of those things are very sad. We need a club. No, not that AARP club, but a different one. :)
@Karen-- I plan on bringing Despondex with me everywhere I go, just in case.
As I am headed into my 40th year of life, I have found myself rapidly declining (eyesight, teeth, memory, etc.) It's pathetic.
lolol - I'll join you there - only I'd like to take at least twenty years off - *looks around a button to make it happen*
@LOL! AJB, at least we have each other. Oh, wait, that's not really comforting at all, is it. ;)
@LOL! Penny, we do need some sort of Staples "easy button" option.
Yes! The easy button! And then a tracking device on it because I lose track of everything these days.
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