Here’s the Thing

I have two things on my mind at the moment, so you are getting them both (why does that sound like a threat?).

First:

I really like this article: http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/news/article-23392788-details/
I’m going to concur and say that this is 100% true. This is based on years and years of trying to eat my body weight in chocolate. It’s based on my last biology class, which was sometime last century. It’s also based on years and years of not being kissed, and the bitterness that this has caused—which I suppose has added to my original determination to eat my body weight in chocolate. See, everything comes back to the beginning. Circle of life, my friends :)

If my goal for the year (it’s actually on the sacred New Year’s resolution list) is to go out on a date, eventually there might be a kiss in my future. Right? Ok, so after 5 or 6 months of cautious hand-holding (obviously, after the background check comes back clean—I mean, I’m not easy), I could finally work up to a kiss. But if that kiss has less long-term satisfaction than something I can get now at the grocery store, couldn’t I just jump straight to the chocolate part of the relationship (the one that comes after the break-up and the rocking back and forth in the corner)? It just seems like less work. I mean, I don’t have to fill out a 27 page form in order to meet some chocolate that might be a suitable partner. I’m just saying.


Second:

This thought is for all of you who actually know men. Please pass along this little tip. Boys, don’t hit on a girl while you are complaining to your friend about your current relationship. Seriously, it tends to make the new object of your semi-affection ponder your sincerity.

I was walking through the parking lot of my dance studio when two attractive men were walking towards their cars. The dark-haired guy was quite loudly expressing to his friend that he thought the “honeymoon phase with her” has ended. In the midst of continuing his thought about his relationship, he turned to me and gave me the full-on Joey Tribbiani treatment. I’m not kidding—I got the full “how you doin’?” with the eyebrows and the grin. I couldn’t decide if I should be flattered that a guy actually noticed me, or offended for girlfriends everywhere.

I settled for confused. It’s what I do best.

Kate